“Do you mean it?”, He whispered.
“Excuse me?”, I asked.
I’m so glad God, the Creator, Omniscient Holy One, speaks to me on a personal level. I can’t be convinced otherwise. I’ve experienced it firsthand over and over again. I know the voice of my Abba Father.
That day, on an April morning in 2001, in the beautiful mountains of NC, on the front row of a packed out church building, God spoke to me. He whispered one question.
“Do you mean it?”
I was taken aback. I was a bit confused. But, I knew it was the Lord’s voice that spoke to me. The question swirled from my head to my heart, and I realized what He was asking.
What was to become my forever favorite worship song was being skillfully and passionately played and sung by one of the most anointed worship teams I’ll ever know. The song was, “All I Want to Do.” (Listen here, to the closest version I could find: All I Want to Do)
The chorus says:
All I want to do is love You,
All I want to do is worship You,
All I want to do is stay here right at Your feet.
As I lift my hands to heaven, let Your fire fall down on me.
Rekindle the fire within me, Lord, once again.
Being about the third song of the set so far, it dawned on me, I was just going through the motions. All the “right” things to do during worship song-time, like, lifting my hands, closing my eyes, singing the words, clapping and amening,…I was doing. I looked right. To someone observing, I was a real worshiper.
But, God.
He sees and knows all things (Heb. 4:13). The hidden parts of my heart that even I cannot see, He sees. Until it is revealed in His light of love, how can I ever know?
I’ve always had the heart to be genuine, real, authentic. Thus, a daily prayer of mine is that God would search the depths of my heart and shine a spotlight on things not pleasing to Him. Also, I pray that my mind is renewed to think like Him. When He does show me things that need to be worked on, it doesn’t feel like condemnation or rejection. Instead, I sense remarkable love. He loves me enough to correct me, to better me. My weakness revealed in His light brings strength and freedom, and freedom feels good!
That morning, He revealed insincerity in me. He also revealed selfishness.
Oh, I had all kinds of good excuses for why I was locked up and imprisoned in my own little world. The trauma I had faced earlier that year, the harassment of the enemy working through others, and the prior two years of traveling as a young bride with my evangelist husband were not at all the romantic notions I had in mind (but, I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything in the world), among other things, all contributed to my “jail”. (Apologies for that massive run on sentence.) Those stories are for another blog and another time!
I was mouthing the words, hands lifted high, “All I want to do is love You…all I want to do is worship You…” when the Lord’s words struck me hard. Just a whisper, so slight, yet shaking and waking.
At that moment, I chose to hear and do. I sighed a prayer of repentance and lifted my face, lifted my hands higher, and opened my heart to Jesus. I answered His question with a sincere, heartfelt, passionate – “YES”! Yes, I did want to love Him, yes, I did want to worship Him.
Though I wasn’t, I felt as if I were on my tippy-toes, reaching so desperately and so hard to hug God and love Him, when finally, I felt feather-light. All of a sudden, I was being transported from the prison of my emotions into what I can only guess was the very throne room of God. Never before and never since have I experienced anything like that moment.
Everything faded. The music. The church. The people. ME. There, in an atmosphere of pure love and brilliant light… I’ve only ever been able to describe it as a waterfall of liquid gold, diamonds, emeralds, water, oil, fire, and wind all at the same time. In that split second, I physically felt warm all over inside and out. It was as if a big cup of peace was being poured over and in me.
Unlocked by the power of worship.
True worship is an unlocking key to freedom. Worship connects us with the Father, bringing us into His presence. His presence sets us free and keeps us free! 2 Cor. 3:17.
I have never been the same since that day. It transformed me in ways I cannot express.
This breakthrough testimony came back to me during our ReFuel service at #TheLift last night (Jan. 10). Keith, my favorite preacher, who happens to be my hubby, preached a powerful message about worship and shared one of his breakthrough stories. You can watch it here: Worship While You Fast. It’s not just about Fasting, it mostly focuses on breakthrough coming through worship, so take time to watch it! He explains what true worship is and how we can enter in.
Do you need peace, deliverance, healing, or freedom from the bondage of emotions? I encourage you to WORSHIP! Start focusing on God and His promises. List the good things in your life and thank God for them. Turn your eyes on Jesus. Use the unlocking key of worship and walk through the door that releases you into His presence.
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